Part II: Why is social engagement important?
I recommend that you read Part I before continuing with this blog. It will give you some insight into the differences in some of the terms that are used.
Let’s continue with our subject of communication and how to move forward with toddlers and preschoolers who are not yet communicating their wants and needs.
One way children start to communicate is to grab a parent’s hand to guide them to what they are requesting, many times a snack or drink. I am happy to hear when children exhibit this behavior because it is social and communicative! The child is initiating/making contact with another person (social) and taking them to something that is wanted (requesting/communication). Now we build on this communication. Ask your therapist to assist you in modeling language (verbal and gestural) during these times of engagement.
Communication
Our goal is for our children to communicate. We want our children to have a “voice” but that refers to having a means of communicating, not just a verbal voice. I like to model many modes of communication at the beginning, so that a child has an opportunity to imitate something and begin to use it meaningfully and as a result lowering anxiety, frustration, and tantrums. These different modes include, pointing, facial expressions, gesturing, signs, and verbal speech. Your therapists will assist you with modeling and reinforcing.
Socialization
Focusing on the social part (play and engagement) builds the platform for communication and speech to occur. This is why social engagement is so important. It is during these times of shared play that children will begin to imitate play, gestures, and words. We want to provide many opportunities to engage (play) with our children in order for these behaviors to become typical, natural and expected.
Take the needed steps to provide lots of engagement with your child. Sometimes it starts by just being there. Get down on the floor, on your child’s level and begin to play with his toys with him, start to read one of his books, or grab a bottle of bubbles and start engaging with your child, building a platform for communication to occur. Check out this blog on engagement.
Here are some things to do when a child is not yet using words:
1. Encourage him to imitate gestures during finger-plays and songs.
2. Encourage him to point to a picture in a book when you label it.
3. Encourage him to hold his arms up to be picked up.
Engagement
Remember that you are your child’s teacher as well as his parent. It is great when a child is playing with a toy independently and is engaging with it as it is intended to be played with. That’s great some of the time. We also want to engage children in social play to give them lots of opportunities to imitate. That means modeling for your children what you want them to do and what you want them to say, not just once or twice a day, but many times throughout your day. This means throughout your daily routines, bath time, bed time, meal times, play times, basically any moment of your day can be a teaching moment. Your therapists can assist you with how many times a day and for how long. This will be very different for each child, as they all have different tolerance levels.
So basically we want children to imitate, be social in their play, and have meaningful communication.
- Imitate. When children are not imitating our speech, we want to teach them how to imitate. We can’t make a child imitate our speech, but we can help him in imitating a gesture, play task, or finger-play by providing lots of modeling (you say or do what you want them to say or do). Provide lots of reinforcement so your child understands that this is what he is supposed to be doing.
- Social. Provide opportunities to engage with your child. Get down on your child’s level and play with his toys. Sing songs or blow some bubbles. You are encouraging your child to look at you as you bring the bubble wand to your face. Children will naturally look at you when they feel comfortable.
- Meaningful. We want children to attach meaning to what they say or sign. You can model language by labeling everyday items and people that are important to your child. As you give your child his favorite snack or drink, make sure you are labeling them. Talk about what you are playing with, labeling animals, people, and other functional words. Some other categories include foods, clothing, body parts, and favorite toys.
Keep engaging with your child. It takes time but your child will begin to respond to your efforts in time. Provide opportunities for your child to imitate finger-plays, waving, popping bubbles, and pointing to pictures in books.
Here are some other blogs to consider:
1. Lowering Anxiety
2. Getting Creative with your preschooler
3. Do-It-Yourself therapy tool
4. Giving Praise
5. Appropriate Reinforcers
I have suggestions here for toys and books that are great for toddlers and preschoolers.
Choosing a few tasks that your child loves is a great place to start. Your presence and engagement with your child is more important than the toy.
Let me know how it goes!